They said things like “oh you’ll make a great library director” and “it’s easy, you’ve already got it!” and other stuff like that. They told me that to make the big bucks in the library world that administration would be the next step, most likely followed by the “I’m disillusioned by being a library director so now I’m a library Iconsultant” path. I listened to them, and then I did the work of a library director from June 15, 2015 until January 3, 2023, or two thousand, seven-hundred and sixty days. Now that I am looking back upon things, I will say that this specific type of library work was not for me.

FIRST: I did enjoy some of the work. I always like library work where I can connect with a community. I did that a lot. I also really liked watching some of the people who I managed grow and evolve. One thing that I found out that I really enjoy is taking a look at systems and processes in depth and revising them (or leaving them alone!) as needed. I also enjoyed creating polices and procedures that reflected the values of the community and the work that the staff were doing in those moments.

SECOND: The hardest part for me was dealing with the various different people, groups, etc and their politics while still holding onto who I am at the core and what I believe is the best forward for the library as the leader. I do my best to listen to everyone, and one thing that I learned is that I don’t have to listen to everyone. I can choose who I should be listening to, and adopting that filter would have helped me considerably. At those times, I also didn’t hold onto my library beliefs and core values as much as I should have. I believe that the best public libraries in the world don’t focus on stuff…they focus on people and community. When there was friction or pressure, sometimes I feel like I didn’t give my all to my core public library values. I should not have done this, as over time it whittled me down and I lost track of who I am.

THIRD: I’m pretty good with people, but managing people is hard and it’s not something that I think I want to do again on a big level. I would not mind being a branch manager. I like that scope and the size of that kind of job. Sometimes there are just people who work in libraries, and let’s face it, sometimes it is time for them to move on and try something else. I wasn’t that good at helping those people move along. I like to work, but I also do not believe work should be our identities. I also believe that everyone has a right to work and earn their living and then live their lives. It was hard for me to move people along who shouldn’t be working in libraries because of those beliefs, and in turn I think I hurt the libraries I worked for, the staff that worked hard to make the library be there for the people, and in the end the community.

FOURTH: I feel like there was an urge in me to write about how creative it is to be a library director back in the day when I was a library director. I should re-read those pieces, because now that I think about it I now see that a creative person (me in this case) is not a good fit for a library director. At those times, I think that I was writing a lot about that because I really wanted it to be true so that I could fit myself into this role. Being a library director does require some creative thinking, but the amount that I want in my life was not the amount that being a library director ever gave to me.

FIVE: So what is the big takeaway from 2,760 days as a library director?

• I can always be more patient. Being patient is a very helpful thing.
• If I work in libraries again, I want to be a Teen Librarian but I would be open to a Branch Manager role.
• If work makes me unhappy, don’t stick with that job. Go for the next thing.